Sunday, October 25, 2015

In Dialog with Anarchists

Since our first episode, The Haters has been exchanging commentary with other anarchist cultural producers.

Some of the more thoughtful exchanges (with smatterings of pure trollishness) have occurred here, and here. Bellamy, the critique in that last exchange also discussed our show on his new show, The Brilliant (at 4:04).

Below is our retort. If you think anarchist polemics are as much fun as hating hollywood movies, you can weigh in or troll at will.

Friday, October 23, 2015

Episode 8- The Haters v Green Inferno


Welcome to episode 8, in which we indulge in at least ten ad hominem attacks on Eli Roth, because he deserves it. Green Inferno is a terrible, pointless bullshit movie and Eli Roth is a dickhead fratboy. No surprises there, I guess.

The interesting thing is this jerk thought he could put forward a meaningful critique of "social justice warriors". That should be a relatively easy task, but Roth clearly was not up to it.

0:00-3:27 Trailer Impressions-1:49 Ben, ready to give the White frat boy the benefit of the doubt. Like a bro.

3:36-35:25 Groans and Insults
-3:57 this film wins the unfortunately highly sought-after award for Haters' most offensive piece of shit yet.
-4:21 First ad hominem attack
-4:47 Article here: http://www.ign.com/articles/2013/03/01/eli-roth-on-the-horrors-of-the-green-inferno
-5:22 The Roth interview didn't actually say the name of the tribe and we couldn't find it. They spoke Quechua, but that's a language, not a tribe.
-5:57 Second ad hominem
-6:22 Third ad hominem

Sunday, October 11, 2015

Episode 7 - The Haters v Ex Machina




In this episode of the Haters, we want to talk about artificial intelligence, but actually all there is to talk about is misogyny and racism. That's right! We went to see the critically acclaimed and supposedly smart artsy technology thriller, Ex Machina.

Plus we brought in a guest who (unlike us) went to the movie with the intention of loving it, but instead hated it even more passionately than we did.

References:

- Interview with writer/director Alex Garland
How Ex Machina Abuses Women of Color and Nobody Cares Because Its Smart

0-5:37 This is what it sounds like to be running late for a movie
-1:05 flatulence 1
-2:25 Firehawk, figgering out the plot while parking the car, like a pro.
-4:24 if you only listen to the trailer and don't watch it, it looks like this movie is going to have the same themes as Her. But if you look at it, there is clearly some gross other stuff going on.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Episode 6 - Bonus Sandwich on Mad Max Trilogy


Ben keeps his promise from episode one to watch and hate the first three Max Mad films. These films start out almost fun, and then become overwrought and shitty and then become fun again, but in a banal Steven Speilberg kind of way. Basically, they are stinkers, over-all.

0-8:02 Mad Max: Original Flavor

-0:58 be honest, Ben, it's not that you were bored, it's that you ran out of episodes of The Office to binge watch before bed and hadn't yet moved on to Attack on Titan. (psst... don't tell Gus, who highly recommended it as the only good anime, but Attack on Titan is kiiinda a big eugenicist nightmare, isn't it?)
-1:56 Wait, this is a movie about killing cops? Well, I'm sold!
-3:50 Art shapes reality
-5:48 excessive sandwich eating sounds
-6:05 cops getting their jollies
-7:04 did he just compare this movie to Jodorowsky?
-7:52 boomerang audio in reverse sounds IDENTICAL to boomerang audio

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Episode 5- The Haters vs Inside Out



In which a different cast of haters drop more references to beloved children's movies than obscure philosophers, but only barely. Also, gender and scientific reductionism compete for what enrages us most, and people get deep about their feelings.

0:55-12:44 After the trailer
-1:33 gender, first outta the gate!
-2:22 Silas, awkward and disgusting, on my lap, writhing and snuffling like a pig in mud.
-3:37 scientific reductionism enters the fray!
-3:50 gender!
-5:04 Foucault name dropped.
-5:57 gender, pulling ahead!
-7:54 gender, with a commanding lead!
-9:24 scientific reductionism!
-10:08 Gus and Alice debunk tongue phrenology, complete with oral sex innuendo.
-11:03 Umami, the eight emotion.
-12:21 sounds like Gus and Alice need to devote their own episode to that sick Jennifer Lopez thriller.

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Episode 4- The Haters vs The Visit




0-6:52 Pre-game Chatter, in which Ben asks Firehawk all the questions, hinting at spoilers
-1:25 Q1 are you hoping to enjoy this movie?
-1:56 Q2 Do you think it will fulfill those hope?
-2:28 Hater's spoiler: we will be hating Ex Machina sometime
-2:33 Q3 what do you think will be offensive about this movie?
-2:53 Q4 is this the most offensive movie Ben has ever seen?
-3:07 Q5 what do you think this movie will be about?
-4:03 Q6 why do you do the haters?
-5:01 Q7 what is the Shamalyan-esque twist?
-5:35 Q8 what is your opinion of precocious white children who appropriate hip-hop culture complete with misogynist lyrics?
-6:37 LEGAL DISCLAIMER: this statement should not be construed as a real threat to burn M Night Shamalyan at the stake.

Sunday, September 13, 2015

Episode 3- The Haters vs The Man From U.N.C.L.E.


0-9:22 Pre-Game Chatter
-0:41 Firehawk security culture fail
-1:13 Firehawk sexually frustrated?
-2:28 Ben hoping for homo-eroticism (disappointed)
-4:27 Ben tries to conceal his appreciation for Snatch
-5:48 List o hates
-6:57 mourning the appropriation of Nina Simone
-7:43 "You think you're going to be satisfied as a well rounded anarchist after seeing this film?"

Saturday, June 6, 2015

Episode 1: The Haters vs Mad Max Fury Road




Notes and time stamps (approximates):

A Broadcast of Unrepentant Pop Culture Animosity

 WARNING: This is a podcast made by and for over-educated people of an anti-authoritarian persuasion. Anyone is welcome to listen, but don't be surprised if you find our views offensive, or just plain inscruitable. Also, we are not audiophiles and we believe in content over form. Low quality recordings with lots of background noise and fuzzy buzzy sounds are how we gonna roll until we get donations or audio-capable volunteers. Apologies to anyone with low tolerance for fucked sound.

Hatemail: Did we miss an obvious weak spot in the armor of captialist cultural hegemony in a recent review? Do you dispute our assertion that The Matrix and every other piece of shit Wachowski movie is crypto-Lenninist trash? Do you hate us and our pretentious opinions? Oh boy, everybody loves online feuds with strangers! Tell us all about it: insurgenttheatre@riseup.net.
Ohmigosh! You can even flame at us on the facevirus.

Think you can hate? If you would like to make a guest appearance on The Haters, contact Ben at insurgenttheatre@riseup.net or just invite him to go see a movie with you.

Tired of the tardiness with which new hate appears on this site? Sorry, we can get kinda busy trying to make ends meet while working to abolish prisons and other liberatory shit. If you donate, we'll be able spend less time working crappy jobs and more time creating the hate you so urgently desire.

Alternately, you can always go ahead and shit talk movies with your friends. Shit, if you record it and send it to us we might even post it! (Including our own cynical responses, of course).

Contact us: insurgenttheatre@riseup.net or (330) 333 0826

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

What's up with Firehawk?

Firehawk works a regular joe job during the daytime, but at night, she turns into an unrelentingly ferocious raptor, ripping and tearing apart horrible pop culture, vehicular infrastructures, and the patriarchy with her stunning talons. She hates most things, but she really loves billy blanks and tae bo, cascadian doom metal, the desert, and her canine familiar, Toona. Just how and why a bird of prey hangs out with a fox hound remains a mystery to most. In the meantime, we applaud this unprecedented inter-species commingling of the minds because without it, Firehawk would surely not be grounded long enough to do a silly podcast about meaningless hollywood movies.

Hey Ben, Why Are You Such a Hater?

I have jeopardized friendships and driven home in silence after critiquing the Joker's weak immitation of nihilism and Chrisopher Nolan's inability to escape Adam West style cartoonishness in his second "Dark Knight" film. My first girlfriend cited my inability to indulge her guilty pleasure for the newest N'Sync single in her break up talk. I have been a hater for many years. They have been years of loss and bitterness, but c'mon, who can honestly tell me that a giant "Ka-POW" star would have been out of place when Batman clotheslined and flipped over that semi-truck? Really!

Despite the social costs, and many paradoxical attempts to authentically embrace a post-modern ironic appreciation of pop culture, or a radical buddhist acceptance of subjectivity, or some good ole proletarian anti-intellectualism, I just keep coming back to this fucking hatred. Something about seeing the negative in things is comfortable and easy for me, I guess.

I used to feel bad about this, like that negative thinking produces more negative thinking, and maybe that's true. By that same logic, authenticity must produce more authenticity, and thus my feelings and expressions of love and support for those who deserve it can only grow alongside the unrestrained vitriol I'm spewing at the horrible cultural articfacts which this hateful world relentlessly insists on producing. Bye Bye Bye, Baby!